May 11, 2021
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It’s always the same thing - someone in your network gets promoted or finds a new job and everyone piles into the comment section to say “congrats!” which feels quite dry and not very personal. 

At The Unicornian, we’re all about bringing the tech community together and fostering great relationships, so we thought we’d come up with an alternative list of things you can say when someone in your network gets promoted or starts a new job.

  1. Boo-yah!

Express the same sentiment but in a way that is entirely different from everyone else on the thread.

  1. Congratu-freakin-lations

“Freakin” is an edgy but safe addition to an otherwise bland greeting. You get to feel like a bad@$$, but keep things family-friendly.

  1. Best news I’ve seen all week

If you like to lie, or your life is just THAT depressing, tell them their promotion/new job is the best news you’ve seen all week!

  1. You are incredible!

Studies show that people appreciate compliments whether they are genuine or not. Posting a compliment is a great alternative to a simple congratulatory message.

  1. Well, I’ll be a son of a monkey!

Why not make your comment stand out by mixing two different expressions together like a veritable verbal fancy ladies drink?

  1. Can I have some money?

Odds are the person you want to congratulate is now making more money than they were previously, so what better time is there to ask for a loan?

  1. Hope your toe fungus has improved!

Secretly hate them for their good fortune? Help their new team members get to know them better by posting something embarassing on their announcement. This could be a medical condition, an embarrassing anecdote, or  fact that they find The Big Bang Theory funny.

  1. I guess they haven’t looked through your old tweets…

Giving them an adrenaline rush is a great way to make them feel excited! They might not even be on Twitter, but if you post this classic line, you can bet their heart rate will go from 80 to 160 very quickly.

  1. Share this incredible video with them.

Sending someone a video as profound as this one is probably one of the best possible ways you can celebrate their career update.

  1. AAAHHHHHHHHHH

Why use words when a simple scream will suffice? It’s a quick and easy way to let everyone know how excited you are. Bonus points for multiple exclamation marks!

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